Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Photo by Rob Gierthy
More than halfway through the 2010 season, some newbie skaters are bout ready when DPH plays the Elm City Derby Damez on May 25th. The entire league is excited to see the debut of Sweet Dee Bacle, Hurts & Kisses, Mil Fee and Kelly Von Black. Joan Jett doesn’t give a damn about her bad reputation and neither do these 14 smoking hot, red blooded women who are itching to do some damage.
The first period is dominated by the jamming skills of BSide Blaze, Black & Blue Jean and KD Bang, all three of which scoring grand slams, backed up by jammers Candy Flip’Her and Bada Bing King, both jamming for the first time. All jammers are able to take the inside line, assisted by a team full of great offensive players, while simultaneously maintaining a strong defense. DPH is awarded lead jammer in every jam and ends the first period with an impressive 74 points, shutting out the fledgling Elm City team.
The second period begins with a phenomenal booty block from Smash to Pieces and some great defense from our 4 rookie skaters. With such a strong lead the DPH bench coaches decide that this is a great opportunity to try out some new jammers. The crowd is enthralled by some big scoring jams from jammers Joan of Arkham, Sweet Dee Bacle, Milfee and Hurts and Kisses. Veteran blockers Smash, Cyndy and Sin also take their turn on the jammer line and with the help of some great assisting blockers like Candy, Kelly and Bing manage to make it through reasonably unscathed. Elm City is able to eke out 14 points in the period, ending our shut out but not threatening our formidable lead.
Again the bench coaches decide that this is the opportunity for fun and in the first jam of the third period we see KD Bang passing the jammer star to Hurts & Kisses. On the first attempt KD Bang is thwarted by a well timed block and she hits the floor with the jammer panty in her hands. Able to keep her hold on the panty and zooming back into the pack, both KD and Hurts break out of the pack and the hand off goes off this time without a hitch. The period ends with DPH scoring another 38 points with Kelly Von Black taking her first opportunity at the jammer line. DPH with a formidable 164 points and Elm City with only 31, the team heads out to celebrate at the after party where they learn that this is only Elm City’s second bout ever and that they were playing with only a roster of 9. The Elm City girls are gracious and express their happiness at the opportunity to learn and grow.
Favorite Moments: Of course the passing of the panty but also hearing Sin’s voice from the bench yelling, “IN! IN! IN!”. Another gem is Scarlet O’Hackya as announcer telling the crowd that to be a roller derby girl, “All you need is an open mind and a good attitude”.
Highest Scoring Jammer: Black & Blue Jean
Monday, September 27, 2010
This Saturday (October 2) the Empire Skate Troopers will be playing against the Lake Effect Furies over in Buffalo, NY.
Head over to the Facebook Event Page for more details. Then get a caravan together and head on out to enjoy some amazing derby action and legit hot wings!
See you there...
Friday, September 24, 2010
AASRD is beginning pre-season training, and would like to share the experience with you.
We will be hosting Open Recruitment Tuesday, October 5th, at our new training facility, The AASRD Warehouse!
Watch a practice! Ask questions! Meet the Roller Girls!
If you'd like to skate, make sure you attend this event. We likely won't be recruiting again until after the start of 2011 Home Season (January).
For more information, email: recruit at albanyallstars dot com.
LOCATION: The AASRD Warehouse is located at 28 Thacher Street in Albany. Coming from downtown, take Broadway past Wolff's Biergarten and make your first right onto Thacher. The facility is in a pink-ish building just a couple hundred feet down the road on the right hand side, before Thacher Street Pub. http://foursquare.com/venu
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Who's excited for Larkfest? AASRD IS!!!!!
This Saturday, September 25th, is the Larkfest event in downtown Albany. Your all-time favorite roller derby league will be there with bells on. Some of our lovely ladies will be at the fest ready, willing, and wanting to give you our season dates for next year. Also, you can submit your idea for our new team's name and possibly win a pair of tickets for one of our action packed bouts!! So stop on over, say "Hi" and perhaps buy yourself a new AASRD t-shirt so you can show that you love us in 2011!!!
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Photo by Rob Gierthy
So here's what Scarlett did this summer:
July took my soul to West Virginia for the "All Good Musical Festival" I expanded my mind, enjoyed the sweet sounds of the jam band scene and met many free thinking individuals who shared common ideas and ways of life. Obviously I couldn't satisfy my palate and needed more music! August was tormented with the east coast Umphrey's McGee tour . I raged my face off and danced hard all night long!! The Catskill Chill music Festival kicked off the begining of September, reminding me how I long for the fall and love to sleep outside with cool winds blowing me to sleep. Summer fun is oh sooo sweet!
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
By: Great White Shart
Jumping over fire, sliding into murky 48-degree water, running through the woods and crawling under barbed wire.
It sounds like we might have been running for our lives but we were just willing participants in the North East version of the Warrior Dash. The Warrior Dash is a crazy 5k that was held at Windham Mountain this past weekend. Isabella Bruisalini, Anacringe Skywalker, Julietta Vendetta, K.D. Bang and I were just a few of the Albany All Stars that participated in this weekends Warrior Dash.
What a challenge! What a rush! The first 1.5 miles of this insane 5k are spent climbing hills that most people have skied down. The 2nd half of the race was spent running back downhill, sliding in the mud and running through very narrow trails over rocks and streams.
I’ve never done anything this challenging; a year ago, I was a chain smoker whose only physical exertion was walking to the fridge. Now, I’ve finished my first 5k. The most insane 3-mile run one could choose. I’m proud of myself. I was proud of myself at the top of the mountain, only 1.5 miles through the race. I’m proud of my teammates too; Vendetta completed the race with a sprained knee and none of us gave up ever.
I fell many times and bruised my knees, going down the waterslide, I got kicked in the chest (by accident), and there are puncture wounds in my hands from when I fell trying to get out of the way of other runners.
What an amazing race though. Who’s signing up next year???
Monday, September 20, 2010
Last night we had the immense pleasure of having B-Train as our coach at the Albany Men's Roller Derby practice. B-Train co-owns Wicked Skatewear and she skates for the Orange County Roller Girls.
She gave us an intense 30 minutes of endurance followed by some great drills. We all learned so much and were very sweaty, sore, and exhausted by the end of it. It was an amazing experience to say the least.
It was very generous of her to give up her own time to come and show us some great derby moves. Thanks again B-Train!
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Fresh off of a second place finish at the inaugural Empire Skate Showdown, a New York roller derby tournament, the Albany All Stars are pleased to announce the 2011 home season at the Washington Avenue Armory. Season plans include nine bouts of inter-league and intra-league play. Bouts are scheduled for: 1/8, 1/29, 2/19, 3/19, 4/2, 4/30, 5/21, 6/11, and 6/25.
Specifics are still in the works, but fans can be assured the All Stars will continue to wow the masses with aggressive play, foxy flair, and jaw dropping talent on eight wheels. As was the case with the All Stars past three seasons, each event will appeal to both young and old, hosting a live local band and a featured charity that will benefit from a portion of the proceeds.
The 2011 Home Season will host the return of fan favorites such as Dottie Damage, Big Headed Honky, and Merry Pain, as well as introducing new skaters like Katherine Zeta Bones, Explosive Daria, and Anacringe Skywalker. Some changes are in store for the All Stars, however. Due to significant growth over the past year, the league will be expanding to three home teams for the 2011 season. As such, they’re hosting a contest to name the team that will accompany the already established Empire Skate Troopers and Department of Public Hurts. The All Stars request fans submit ideas to email@example.com; each email should include suggested name, uniform theme, and colors. If selected, a fan could win a pair of tickets for a bout during the 2011 season. Entries will be accepted until 11:59PM on Tuesday, September 28th, and a winner will be selected prior to October 4th.
Join the Albany All Stars at the Washington Avenue Armory for another great season of all women’s flat track roller derby. Fans are encouraged to stay informed via the league’s website, Facebook, Twitter, and blog. And for those that crave even more derby – stay posted – recruitment begins next month. For further information, contact the league at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Season dates are also posted on the Washington Avenue Armory website: www.thewashingtonavenuearmory.com
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Maybe you’ve heard, maybe you haven’t, we’re going to have a new team!
I grew up in Binghamton, a small city in Broome County, just above Pennsylvania. Back then, Binghamton had a local AHL-affiliated hockey team that played at the Arena (it still does, although it has morphed a few times since this story of my childhood). When I was an impressionable kid, the team was the Whalers. I have no idea how there happened to be “Whalers” in Binghamton; there certainly weren’t whales in the Chenango and Susquehanna rivers.
Even before the Whalers, (and my time) there were the “Dusters.” I remember sitting in Mrs. K’s 4th grade class and she asked us who knew the name of the local hockey team. Then she asked us if anyone knew the name of the team before the Whalers. I had no clue. She told us it was the Dusters and that she had named them! She said there was a contest and she thought the “Broome Dusters” would be a great name for the team, and to the chagrin of her family, she submitted the name. The powers that were liked it, and for a number of years in the 1970’s, the AHL-affiliated team, which played in the Broome County Arena, was the Broome Dusters.
First of all, here I am 22 years later remembering a silly story from Mrs. K’s class and recounting it to you. So -- Hooray for the silly teachers you remember! Secondly, Mrs. K was very proud her silly-creative streak was appreciated; maybe that’s what stuck with me. I think, however, that this moment in time has stayed with me, because I was taught long division by someone who was so very cool, she named a hockey team.
Here is the point of my rambling: you too could be as cool as Mrs. K. Our new team is going to need a name. So, we are looking to you (our fans) for suggestions. The suggestions could be suggestive, scary, or funny; you name it. Perhaps you can’t come up with a name idea, but you could come up with an awesome theme or a color combination that rocks. Send us your suggestions to email@example.com by 11:59 pm on September 29. If we pick your name, you could score some free tickets. Not to mention, if you are a 4th grade teacher, your students will remember you forever. Really, naming a roller derby team is way more rockin’ than naming a hockey team.
Get your thinking helmets on. We’ve got a new team to name!
Polly Morphic, #79
Photo by Rob Gierthy
The 6th part in a series by Black & Blue Jean
Skating out to the tunes of the “Cops” theme song, the Troopers are pumped for this bout against the Long Island Roller Rebels on June 24th. This bout is their first shot at a self run bench, an attempt at keeping the skaters more engaged and aware of the intricacies of the game (i.e. penalties, what strategies are working). Plagued by penalties in the first period, the troopers fortify their defenses with strong walls and great teamwork. A few of my favorites: Merry Pain and Trixie out front and in another jam Deck’em and Jenny Rotten in the back, both times preventing the opponent from achieving lead jammer status. Kat and Scarlet gain points for EST with some impressive jams. The first period ends with Long Island up by 23 points, 35 to 58. More penalties and a lot of taunting and jammer engagement out of the pack take their toll on the team’s morale. Some great jamming by BSide Blaze, Dottie and Honky allows us to gain another 23 points in the second period but this is no competition to Long Islands additional 40 points. But by the third period, we are filled with piss and vinegar, itching to do some serious damage. Long Island uses a few moves we’ve never seen before, like standing on the pivot line after the whistle is blown in order to waste time and allow their players in the penalty box to reenter the pack. But tricks are not enough to deter the Troopers anymore and with one hell of a jam by Honky, scoring 15 points and some great smaller jams from Scarlet, BSide and Dottie, the troopers score a whopping 32 points in the last period. Disappointingly, Long Island scores another 33 points in the third period and EST loses, 131 to 90.
Highest Scoring Jammer: BSide Blaze
Monday, September 13, 2010
(Photo by: Wolfgang Kurth)
I’m fresh meat – cook me quick!
Truth is, I was a skate rat. In the 80s and 90s you could find me at Rollarama nearly three days a week. Skating kept me out of trouble. Most of my friends were partying – bonfire hangouts, underage drinking. I was skating.
In a blink, I was a wife and mother. Everyone seemed to have their hobbies. My husband had fishing, my kids had sports and other interests. I had the privilege of having a wonderful family – that is a lot, really it is. But it’s not enough. Just because we grow up and become adults, doesn’t mean that we have to lose our identity. I suddenly had nothing going on. And my good friends could be counted on one hand. Life simply takes over, family becomes a priority. We go from living for ourselves to living for everyone but ourselves.
Well, my kids finally became old enough to try skating and without hesitation, I took them. Keeping them on their feet killed my back. I wanted to ditch them and skate…Funkytown was on god damn it! They began to skate on their own in no time so…..mama needed a new pair of skates. We were going a few times a month. I wanted to skate more. I looked up the AARSD website and yikes – those chicks looked a bit bad ass for me. I mean, look at their pics and bios – they are a little intimidating. But, I wanted to skate more. Finally, this spring I attended Recruitment and in May, I was at my first practice. There was no kiddie pool that day. For some reason, I was the only fresh meat there and Elle told me I would be practicing with everyone – they were doing SUICIDES. (come again, what?).
The practices in June were extremely difficult. It was bout season for the team and they were hard core practicing three days per week. I had been so inactive in recent years, that my knees would crack upon standing, could I keep up with this? The first three minutes of a typical practice is running around the track. Let’s get this straight, I run on Dunkin – that about all the running I do. I got through the running part (painfully) and then it was high knees and ass kickers. Oh, and then…PLANKS (umm, yeah, need to work on that too). Finally, you can lace up your skates and begin practicing. Around the track without stopping, skating on one foot, down on one knee and up, baseball slides, etc. This went on for a while and I had never been so exhausted. I was sweating, out of breath, dying of thirst, but I kept skating and I finished. Or, I thought I finished. My head was pounding, my helmet was getting tighter – I was thinking…um, brain aneurism? I thought if I removed my helmet, I wouldn’t be able to get it back on. My head felt like it was expanding! This was an endurance drill. After it was done, us “freshies” moved on to the kiddie pool. Thank god, I just couldn’t possibly have done any more or pushed myself any harder. I was willing to just lay down and let them use me as something to practice their jumps! To my amazement, the seasoned girls, after all that endurance, began relay racing. Seriously? How could they keep going? In the last 45 minutes, they scrimmaged!! They had what I didn’t….stamina. I guess this will come after months of practice – you get conditioned. (I hope)
So, I show up in mid-June to begin practice and learn that I would be able to scrimmage. I realized quick that being a good skater only gets you so far. You need strength, you need endurance, you need stamina and almost three months later, I realize most importantly, you need skills….not so much skating skills ---- derby skills. Thankfully, there are many practices before the next season begins. You can read the 46 pages of rules but when you are out there, it is like a hurricane!
Finally, I have to end with the addiction that Derby is. All of us girls have the same feelings about it and I know, we spend way too much time talking, researching and thinking about it. It’s something only a fellow derby girl could relate to. My non-derby friends just think I am crazy. I am happy to be doing something I love and to have an outlet, to have something for ME. Funny, a few years ago, my kids didn’t even know I was a skater. I was just Mom. But I was something more than Mom and I want them to know not only who I am today but what made me who I am today. I hope they will support me, I hope they will come and watch me skate in a bout, I hope they will cheer for me and my team…I hope they will be proud.
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Photo by Rob Gierthy
The 5th part in a series by Black & Blue Jean
The Empire Skate Troopers prepared long and hard for their April 3rd bout against the Boston B Party, a team they had heard was merciless. We were all sure these ladies would be our most formidable opponents and most likely our biggest challenge of the season. Our roster is rounded out by the addition of “floaters” Betty Blitzkrieg, Bada Bing King, Deck’em Beckham and Joan of Arkham. The bout begins with EST obtaining lead jammer twice in a row, once by Honky and a second time by Dottie, a good sign for our team. The packs are fast and the opponents’ walls are tight. Some impressive footwork by Dottie Damage and aggressive skating by BSide Blaze help force the opposing jammers call off the jams prematurely and the period ends with Boston up by 20 points, 38 to 18. We are already tired but we feel the passion for our sport burning in our chests during the break and we all know we have more to give. The second period begins and our jammer is sent to the box in the first jam for an illegal procedure. BSide Blaze, with help from Glamthrax acting as her personal bull dozer, and Honky, getting low and using her ninja skills to sneak by, score most of the points for EST in this period. A big hit from Merry Pain, as the opposing jammer gets whipped into her blocker, help the EST cause as do a few good walls from Liv and BJ and new EST skaters Deck’em and Betty. At the end of the second, EST was only able to score another 20 points to Boston’s 40, leaving EST trailing 78 to 38. The third period is more of the same, some good attempts at defense and some excellent jams by Honky keep the crowd excited and cheerful. Despite the valiant effort of the Troopers, the skaters are bested by the Boston B Party, 51 to 120.
Favorite Moments: The locker room, seeing the determination in everyone’s eyes and knowing that every skater willingly skated her heart out until the bitter end.
Highest Scoring Jammer: Dottie Damage
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Although it's a little hard to see in this picture, that's the Albany All Stars in the finals against the Gotham Girls' Wall Street Traitors! In the end they beat us, but we played fast and furious with only 8 girls. To see just how hardcore these ladies are, check out Merry Pain's recap:
Some of us are still on this weekend's high and walking with limps!
Here are some of the highlights:
Liv Dangerously: Threw up in her mouth while jamming and kept skating. You read that right, she swallowed it, AND KEPT SKATING!
Dottie Damage: Jumped a handful of fallen players all at once because she, "was too tired to fall!"
Betty Blitzkrieg: Took a helmet to the face and snapped her head backwards. She was tended to by EMTs and still got back up to play!
Black & Blue Jean: Was voted MVP for the tournament's final bout!
Joan of Arkham: Assist after assist, she kept getting right back into every jam!
Trixie Firecracker: Took a flying toss (initiated by teammate, Katastrophe) into the opposing jammer and literally boomeranged back into action!
Merry Pain: GGRD's Wall Street Traitors commented on how brutal her hits were.
Katastrophe: Was voted MVP by other leagues for the entire tournament!
These girls played like I've never seen them play before. They gave 199% in every jam, pushing through pain and pushing beyond exhaustion.
Every minute was totally worth it!
In this photo: Merry Pain, Liv Dangerously, Black & Blue Jean, Katastrophe, Trixie Firecracker, Dottie Damage, Betty Blitzkrieg & Joan of Arkham.
Here are the full results of the tournament:
Bout 1: AASRD 56 vs Hudson Valley Horrors 50
Bout 2: CNY Roller Derby 63 vs The Hellions of Troy Roller Derby League 43
Bout 3: Long Island Roller Rebels 126 vs Assault City Roller Derby 11
Bout 4: Wall Street Traitors 53 vs Ithaca League of Women Rollers SufferJets 32
Bout 5: AASRD 53 vs CNY Roller Derby 51
Bout 6: Wall Street Traitors 50 vs Long Island Roller Rebels 41
Bout 7: Hudson Valley Horrors 83 vs The Hellions of Troy Roller Derby League 43
Bout 8: Ithaca League of Women Rollers 68 vs Assault City Roller Derby 32
Bout 9 (Championship): Wall Street Traitors 85 vs AASRD 20
Many thanks to the Long Island Roller Rebels for hosting this tournament, and to everyone who came out to play and support. AASRD is thrilled to have participated.
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Photo by Rob Gierthy
The 4th Part of a series written by Black & Blue Jean.
Their third bout in a row, DPH is determined to outperform their competition on March 13th against the Utica Rollergirls. Some impressive jamming by Betty Blitzkrieg, Scarlet O’Hackya, Deck’em Beckham and Black & Blue Jean, makes it a close bout at the end of the first period with DPH down by 5 points. We get lead jammer numerous times in the second period but both teams are plagued by penalties making defense in the pack a struggle. A ten point jam by Betty Blitzkrieg helps heave us forward but DPH is trailing by 22 points at the end of the second period. But that doesn’t matter to these women because they are hell bent on victory. They come barreling back onto the track with a vengeance scoring another 64 points in the last period with two impressive grand slams from Scarlet O’Hackya and Black & Blue Jean. In the very last jam of the period DPH is up by 6 points. With sweat in their eyes and blood surging through their veins the last skaters approach the line. Prevented from taking lead jammer status, the skaters recycle relentlessly trying to prevent the opposing jammer from scoring. In a blur the last jam ends and the entire team stares at the scoreboard in anticipation. But DPH is down by 2 points and suffers their third loss in a row. Undeterred by this fact, the DPH’ers know that they have never skated harder before that night and they feel more like a team than ever before, something almost as good as victory.
Favorite Moment: The after party where every woman in a blue Dickie’s shirt knew she was a winner regardless of points.
Highest Scoring Jammer: Scarlet O’Hackya
Sunday, September 5, 2010
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
(Photo by: Glenn Davenport)
Part 3 of the 2010 Season Recap - A multi-part segment by Black and Blue Jean.
The Cooler Incident:
Feeling more cohesive and generally more experienced, the Department of Public Hurts welcomed two more rookie skaters, Cyndylicious and Candy Flip’Her, to their roster on February 20th. Up against the Derby Debutantes from Toronto, the first period began slowly with some clumsy falls. A few good jams and some solid pack work left DPH down by 11 points, a small gap that could easily be closed.
In the second period we were awarded lead jammer quite a few times thanks to the fast footwork of jammers Katastrophe, KD Bang, Betty Blitzkrieg and Jenny Rotten. Some phenomenal three or four person walls in the front of the pack kept the opposing jammer impotent for most of the period. In the last jam of the period, KD Bang stepped up to the jammer line. As she approached the pack she was thwarted in her attempt at lead jammer. A little push from Candy almost saw her through to the front of the pack, but again she was defeated. Then, as the opposing jammer approached, KD switched to a defensive strategy, crashed into the jammer, and sent them both head first into the water coolers at the side of the track. Ice and water flowed everywhere, including onto the track, forcing the refs to call the jam off to create the most memorable ending of a period in the 2010 season.
As the third period began, Toronto had the clear advantage since our jammer was spending time in the penalty box….as if knocking over water bottles is a penalty. Our blockers put up a strong defense long enough for our jammer to reenter, but she was quickly sent back to the box for a track cut and the jam ended. An inauspicious first jam, the small 13 point gap slowly increased. Our ladies continued to fight hard and there were some more staggering walls of four blockers, my favorites being Elle, Molly, Deck’em and Sin and Molly, Bing, Deck’em and Cyndy. But in the end DPH suffered a second loss, albeit less severe than the last, at the hands of the Derby Debutantes, 96 to 60. A valiant attempt, the skaters celebrated their improvement and crowd pleasing charm over many drinks at the after party.
Favorite Moments: Seeing trash talk on the track from both Joan of Arkham and Betty Blitkrieg.
Highest Scoring Jammer: Katastrophe